Letting Go

Have you ever held on to something so hard and so long that when you try to let go your fist is stiff and refuses to unclench itself? If no then try it, take one of your hands and clench it around the pointer finger of your opposite hand as hard as you can for a minute or two, then remove your pointer finger but keep your hand clenched, lastly slow let your hand unclench. Does it feel stiff and ungiving? I think that's they way letting go of just about anything can feel. We try our hardest to hold on to things because we are afraid of losing something that was once there but is now gone, or we are mad and we hold on to our anger because we are stubborn. The problem with holding on is that the longer we hold on to things, by the time we finally realize enough is enough and we need to let go, we have a hard time doing it because that thing that we have become so used to holding on. We clench up and in the end it causes more pain that it would have in the first place.

Don't get me wrong, when we lose someone or something, there IS a grieving process that we all must go through and will go through, and that process takes different amounts of time for everyone. That being said, there comes a time when we need to be able to let go and give it to God. This is something that I have struggled with A LOT recently. I went through a rough break-up this summer. Honestly, I was not ready to let go when it happened and I fought it for weeks after it occurred. Then I started to go through a time of anger and resentment. I am just now starting to get out of this stage. My problem however is that I have, until recently, been unwilling to let go and give control to God. This is ironic to me because before the break-up I had been struggling to give control to God with another choice in my life, which was whether or not I would be going back to Kuyper College this fall. I had finally come to the conclusion that I just needed to let go and let God and honestly I thought I did a pretty good job. Guess not huh? 

All in all, I don't have a guaranteed formula for letting go of the things that are holding us back. I wish I could say I have all the answers but that would mean I'm not human and I don't need God and that is clearly NOT the case. Letting go is a process, but it is also something that requires the help and peace that only God can give. Hebrews 12:1 says "Therefore, since we are surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses, let us also lay aside every weight, and sin which clings so closely, and let us run with endurance the race that is set before us" Not only does this verse tell us that we should set aside and LET GO of everything the weighs us down but we should do so in order to set an example for those around us. We are indeed surrounded by so great a cloud of witnesses and many of those witnesses are fellow believers! Let's not be afraid to confide in them! One of the biggest helps for me was when I was able to share what I was going through with a great friend and mentor of mine. After we got all done talking and I was completely spent emotionally he turned to me and said "Ryan, do me a favor, Next time call me sooner." We were not meant to carry our burdens on our own. As fellow believers we are called to help one another in our times of trouble and sometimes this means helping each other let go. My challenge to you my readers is this. If ever you find that you are having trouble letting go of something, don't go about it alone! at a bare minimum bring it before God. Cry out to the God who loves you and say "I CAN'T HOLD ON TO THIS ANY LONGER! HELP ME!"1 John 5:14-15 says "This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us. And if we know that he hears us - whatever we ask - we know that we have what we asked of him" and once you have done that, if you feel comfortable, confide in a fellow brother or sister in Christ. Supporting one another is one of the things we are called to do.

Until next time folks,
TTFN

Surrender

Have you ever had one of those times where you are just so far down that you feel like you can't move? find it hard to breathe? to think? I had one of those times a few days ago. I hardly even knew what was going on. The events of the day just had me so down that I refused to even think and went into robot mode. One of the things that I struggle the most with is surrender. No matter what I go through, no matter how hard it is, I just can't bring myself to surrender it to God sometimes.  This day was no different.

Looking back on it I find myself so blessed to live around the people that I do and be immersed in the amazing community of Kuyper College. The thing that finally turned me around and made me decide to surrender it to God? A discussion with a beloved friend and former faculty member of Kuyper. I'm going to dearly miss this person around Kuyper and I am sad to see them go. When I heard that they were being let go I immediately started to question what was going on and why this was happening. Why was God taking away a person that I found it so easy to talk to about my life? I just surrendered everything to him and this is how he repays me? That's how I felt all day. Then, sitting here about 30 minutes ago I remembered my conversation with said person. I remembered how they told me that everything is in God's hands and we just have to be willing to let him work. So I sat down and I once again embraced surrender. Embraced a God who is willing to take my pain, sorrow, and anger,  and replace it with peace. An everlasting peace that I can't even begin to describe.

Why do we find it so hard to surrender sometimes? Those of us who have done it, know that we need to and we know the sense of peace that washes over us because of it, yet somehow we still don't want to do it. Is it the part of human nature that to some extent makes us all control freaks? This is my challenge to you my readers: Let it go. It's as simple as that. Let it go. If there's something you're holding onto and you're afraid of surrender just let it go. Give it to the God who loves you and cares for you. The one who will never lead you astray. Put your life in his hands. Because I can promise you that the peace that will wash over you will be beyond your wildest dreams.

To the person that I had my discussion with, if you're reading this, you know who you are. You will be dearly missed at Kuyper College my friend and I will never forget you. Nor do I think, will a lot of the other students and faculty. May God grant you peace in this hard time and may you embrace him even now as he reaches out and embraces you. Go with God.